My Zazzle

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Hey, Hey, I'm a Monkey

Hey, Hey, I’m a Monkey.
Or, Curse You, Davey Jones.

No, not cute lil’ Davy, singer of “Cheer up, Sleepy Jean” and “Valeri”, but the First Lieutenant to Neptunus Rex, Ruler of the Raging Main.

It all went down like this:

Late in the day, and we were set to sail the next.
The Marines had just made their appearance. Nice kids, from Cherry Point. Ordnance guys. “G” and “P”. We had a need for overnight watch-standers, and they graciously volunteered. Really. Came in handy later, when one of the Navy EOD guys [Explosive Ordnance Disposal] was not qual-certed, and P replaced him on the 470 boat, passing the primer to the raft. But I digress.

Late in the day, sailing the next. Light was beginning to fade, so I had my sunglasses sitting on my ballcap. At sea, I planned to use a different pair, cheaper, on a lanyard. These were my Oakleys, bought them in Arlington Texas back in 2003. $125 at the running store.

I had lowered the Pilot’s Ladder into the water for use in qualifications. Since I did not know P or G from Adam, I had them don their life jackets and climb down the ladder [it’s a rope ladder with wooden steps] down the side of the ship, to the water and back to the top and onboard. I do this for every crew member, to make sure that they are athletic enough to accomplish it, and don’t have any overwhelming phobias which would foul things up at sea, since we would be doing several transfers from ship to boat and back during the project.

I bent over to check on one of the guys, and bloop! My Oakleys slid off my ballcap into the drink. They’re floating!!! No, they’re sinking very slowly. I was angry, and I cursed Davey Jones. This is PG rated, so I won’t detail exactly what I said, but King Oedipus would have been proud of the phrasing I used.

Not a good idea. Davey Jones, as you well might imagine, has the ear of Neptunus Rex, Ruler of the Raging Main, ol’ Poseidon Hisself. We now faced the danger of bad weather [and who knows what other torments] at sea. Davey was not homicidal [whew!!] but DID get his point across. The weather WAS poor most days at sea, and we experienced difficulty [read that as “danger”] in our boat transfers, and it rained a lot, and blew, and coming back up the channel to Morehead City, it was foggy, and muggy, and a zillion degrees, Fahrenheit. Bless you! Did I mention we saw sharks?

More details in a later missive. Stay tuned!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

You know, if you ever tee Davey off again, just sing to him. Or let me know you teed him off and I'll haul ass to shoreline to do the singing for you. :) (Seth thinks it's weird when I sing and then there are big waves. He's entirely convinced at this point that I am in fact a Selkie changling. If he's right, I would like to know where the f--- Seth hid my damn skin. The ocean is where it's at.)

Remember, Chuck, you don't have to swim faster than the shark, just faster than the people you're swimming with! (Sharks are my worst phobia ever. Period. And the more I learn, the more freaking frightening they are.)

Charles L. Wallace said...

Nice one, Janie Johnson ;-) Aye, and thankee, Selkie miss, for a-takin' my cause wif ol' Davey. He and I are square, now.

The Sea.
She's a Cruel Mistress....

Mayhap, but she's cost me less than many t'other gal =:-0

Anonymous said...

Yeah, even us low-maitenance girls are expensive. (It costs a lot to keep me in 360 games, you know.) Most welcome any time. :)

Sox tix go on sale tomorrow for Christmas!!!!! Hopefully Mom can get the drop on it (she still owes me a pair from two christmases ago.)

Happy Friday! I'll have to let you know how the Golden Compass is- going to see it Sat. with some friends.

Charles L. Wallace said...

Smashing idea, Mellie - I think I will go to the noon showing as well ;-)